Saturday, August 21, 2010

I Had Glass of Wine With an Elvis Impersonator Last Night

We met friends at Savvy Cellars only to find that they had extended their hospitality to their postman, an Elvis impersonator.He was off-duty but still startlingly clad in summer weight hot pink trousers, a lime green shirt, navy blazer, plaid sneakers, signature sideburns and wavy black (glued on) hair.  After I raised a toast to impersonators everywhere because we are all impersonators sometime, we settled in for a bottle.

We didn't ask him much about the impersonator business because he has also been the local postman for the last 24 years and we found news of how our home town works to be more comforting. He gave us all kinds of scoop:
  1. The weight limit on a mail bag is "theoretically" 35 lbs.
  2. Ideally a delivery man will spend 2 hours sorting mail and 6 hours delivering.
  3. There are 7 bar codes around town that postpeople scan revealing their progress along the route to corporate.
  4. Centralized mailboxes for planned unit developments don't allow the postman to check on people to see if there are any B & E signs or papers piled up on a 94 year old lady's doorstep to signal injury, illness or death.
  5. There's a special page in the postman's rag honoring those who have saved lives in the line of duty.
What I find fascinating in retrospect is why we so studiously avoided the elephant in the room, the moose on the table?
  1. Was impersonation a lifestyle or a business?
  2. Why chose Elvis?
  3. How did he get into it?
  4. How does he get gigs? What are they like?
  5. Does he advertise?
Perhaps the toast, "We are all impersonators sometimes" was more appropriate for the evening than anticipated.

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